-6.7.2018

The children in the mountains, they’re in poor condition, they’ve got nothing.
But there’s not a hint of impurity in them.

Just passed two kids playing in an abandoned car.
Not shy at all, smiling at me.
They asked me, “Who are you?
I said: I’m the new teacher at the school.
They smiled at me again.

I said, “When are you coming to school? I’ll teach you”.
They looked at me for a moment and laughed: we’re not going to make it!
I said: “why”?

They didn’t say a word, and seeing their dirty little faces, not being able to see the original color, with a big slit on the bottom half of the dress, I realized how stupid my question was.

I asked: want to go to school?
They say, “Better have fun!

I don’t know what to say, I looked into my bag and found a chocolate that was supposed to be left for the child I was going to visit in the afternoon, who was growing her own food and her father’s salary had to support three people.

I broke a piece of it and gave it to them both, and they put it in their mouths without the slightest hesitation and looked at me and laughed again.
I laughed, too. I said, “I’ll see you later“.
And they smiled at me again, and waved at me.

When I turned around, I heard them say “bye” behind me again.
I turned my head and smiled, turned around and walked back in my direction, and stopped smiling.

Now I especially regret it. Why didn’t I give them a whole bar of chocolate?
It’s not enough. There are so many kids.
I’ll give you all the chocolate I have.

-6.10.2018

The kids seem so happy.

What makes the kids in the mountains especially happy is that they don’t even know what they’re missing, and they can even play with plum kernels.
How I want to keep them happy now.

A little girl was isolated because she lost her best friend’s three RMB (0.5 dollar) and was too afraid to ask her father for it. I bought her four ice popsicles and only ate one, leaving the rest for her younger brother. She got up at 5:30 every morning because it was an hour’s trip to across the mountain to school.

The principal’s son, when I said warm up the meal, grabbed the spatula out of my hand and started frying. When he went home, sat down next to his mother and started picking vegetables immediately.

I asked the kids do they want to play computer games, they so happy that their hands were shaking. Every day, they pick us a bunch of wild fruits, one time he’d catch crabs, the other time he’d catch shrimp for us.

And then there’s the little boy, whose grandmother used to have no light at home, but often didn’t finish his homework when it was dark. In the end, his eyes were nearsighted at over 700 degrees.

Some of the children’s mothers and fathers aren’t there anymore, and they’re just farming with their grandmothers for a living, and some of their fathers are disabled and have to take care of themselves and their fathers.

But they didn’t think they were living in a bad situation, they didn’t think they were unhappy, they didn’t know there are kids’ lives can be simple and easy.

But we know what they might face in the future, what they need now, and we should do something about it.
Since we can see, we should do something. Even a little bit can change a lot.

-Kar Wai Wang

The way to express love is not “I love you”, but you will know the answer two minutes later.

The five protagonists in this movie are lonely. They just try to escape from loneliness in different ways, and return to loneliness again at different times.

The female killer who longs for love falls in love with the male killer who just want accompany. The lonely male bar waiter has felt lonely for the first time after falling in love with flight attendants who’s obsessed with her last lover. The male killer forgot the loneliness with the accompany of a noisy girl, but could not give her love that she wanted most and left.

The movie uses a lot of wide-angle lens which are very close to the characters. People’s faces even occupy half of the picture, which looks very unreal. The deliberate alienation makes the viewers and characters seem to be in two different worlds. The detailed facial expressions and fluid glances of the characters are shown clearly, the emotions are magnified, the surrounding environment is not important, and even a panoramic view is rarely seen in the film.

I can say this movie, doesn’t care about the story, the world, the logic, the future, but only cares about people, people’s emotions and relations between people.

Because of the distance from reality and exaggeration of emotions, their struggles and loneliness are more prominent, like a white smoke that across from the curtain to the viewer’s eyes. By watching them, we see our struggles in love, our fear and alienation of love, the obsession and warmth of love, and the loneliness rooted in ourselves. We see realness and got an understanding from this movie.

At the end of the story, the male bar waiter who firstly failed in love and the female killer who once again fell in loneliness met in a restaurant. They all felt the winter of that year was earlier than before. She put down the bangs and they looked at each other.

The female killer asked him to send her home. They sat on the motorcycle and drove into the tunnel. She leaned on his back and they didn’t talk.

The female killer thought: “I haven’t been on a motorcycle for a long time, and I haven’t tried to be close to a person for a long time, although I know that this road is not very long. I know that I will get off soon. But, at this minute, I feel so warm.”

–Hector.Babenco

“‘The Street Child’ is the first classic film of Argentinean director Hector Babenco to gain international fame. It is one of the best Brazilian films of the 1980s, nominated for the Golden Globe Award for Best Foreign Language Film in 1982 and many other international film awards”.

The prostitute: “he was nice”.
Pixote: “I know, but he was dead”.

It wasn’t his friend who was framed and killed by law enforcement or boarding school defenders, or he accidentally shot the last friend and left himself alone, or lilica on the beach talking in the sunset: “I’m not like you guys, I don’t have a future, I’m just a queer, they’ll always ride on me” are the saddest parts.

It is the day after they repeat these experiences, but the rest of the people go on with their lives and continue to be lied to by adults, or robbed and extorted. The dead people, as if they had just disappeared, were left behind.

Until he mistakenly killed his last friend and vomited with no facial expression after several words with the prostitute at the first. The prostitute holds him, comforts him, begs him to live with her, and he kisses her like she’s his own mother. Remember, he’s not even ten years old. But she wanted to rely on more than she love, and after a moment, she told him to go away, and he resisted, sat up, turned and looked at her, turned again and dressed silently, put away his gun and left.

The protagonist boy was shot dead by the police at the age of 19 at his home for a crime. All of the leads in the film are real street kids the director sought out on the streets of Brazil, and every person and detail is exceptionally real.

According to research, 20 years before 2002, Police in San Paulo killed at least 11,262 people.

The movie was seen on the subscription site of the criterion channel, Martin Scorsese’s recommended list of world movies.

-Agnès Varda

Watch the film again and discover the beauty of Paris, as well as the more subtle ones, and the lighter ones.

Dressed in a white satin robe, her lover came and kissed her promising to try to go out together on Friday; the lyricist-composer pretended to be a doctor to cheer her up; the maid naturally removed her girdle as she cried, thinking: she’s just a child and needs to be taken care of.

But her fear, of herself, of death, is not confronted, she is not respected, “Ugliness is a death, and as long as beauty remains, I live.”
She knew: I was just being spoiled, not being loved.

Changing into a black dress, taking off her wig, and walking up the street alone, the camera looks at all the people before this, while she is in sight, “I thought everyone was looking at me, I had only myself in my eyes and it was wearing me out.” Afterwards the camera also turns to the gestures, the eyes of the people, it is she who is watching the people.

A friend of Cleo’s works as a mannequin in a drawing room, and Cleo is naturally surprised by her candor. Her friend said, “My body makes me feel happy, not proud”.

Probably every woman, in the traditional gender and social perceptions, always stands in the perspective of being scrutinized and can’t help but be hard on herself. But why does it have to be good to be proud of yourself? If not true self-acceptance, the effort is nothing more than filling a bottomless hole.

Makes me wonder, am I also involuntarily judging myself with other people’s ideas?

She opens her heart for the first time to a stranger, a talkative soldier who is about to board the eight o’clock train to leave.

In honesty, she stopped fearing death and ask the result of hospital check ins and decided to enjoy her last moments together.

At this point, the film is coming to an end, and Cleo has completed its own transformation.

Varda is always relaxed, letting us soak in the atmosphere and say a complicated thing. She doesn’t preach or criticize, she just hits the spot and lets the characters achieve it on their own, lifting the weight with beauty.

-Jean-Luc Godard

“I raise my hand, I have a duty; I turn my head, I have a duty; I get upset, I have a duty; I smoke, I have a duty; I close my eyes, I have a duty, even if I forget a duty, but I still have a duty, and I want to tell you that there is no escape, that everything is good, that all you need is an interest in something, after all, things are themselves.”

Free? No total freedom.
can’t do what one wants
But that’s life.

There was also a great discussion about love with the elderly at the cafe.
Because of immaturity.
It’s just the snippets that make the judgement about love.
It’s arbitrary.
This love is broken and unreal.
So be able to love completely.
Proof of maturity.
To be pursued and explored
be able to love
To understand life.

Great discussion of discourse too.

I’ve been thinking lately, too, that a lot of times the real thoughts are always expressed in a personal state, personal writing, etc.
So what’s the meaning of our words in the conversation?
Is it just necessary for social survival?
There are very few conversations where the light comes on.
Most discourse just repeats the inherent idea over and over
And it’s an expression of each individual’s own opinion.
And our words do very little.
So gradually the words don’t come out so much.
Because I want every sentence to be as wasteful as possible.

As the movie says.
The more we talk
The less words mean

Number one: You have to show.

Many people are not without something to show, but are afraid to. Let’s take writing as an example. The question often asked is “Why aren’t my articles being read?” The answers provided by many of famous influencers are for two reasons: first, you wrote it badly; second, you are the only reader. Poorly written that’s a matter of competence. Just showing it to yourself only means that you are afraid to show it and have mental stress: always thinking I write so badly, don’t take it out, it’s embarrassing. If that’s the mindset, it is hard to get attention.

You cannot expect people will find out about you that is only for yourself? Even if you are a pearl buried in the desert, you should at least put it outside. If you just hide it in your own home, nobody will know?

As the saying goes, whether you are a mule or a horse, must pull out and sneak around so that everyone can see and know.

There are so many platforms nowadays, there are Instagram, twitter… all kinds of platforms you can publish your own content, opportunities to be seen. And you lack the courage to show because you’re afraid to show, afraid no one will look.

You do not seek an audience for your work, it is like handing out flyers, it’s about letting the audience find you. It is not enough to see the work as good, for the audience to find you, you have to be findable. The easiest way to get your work out in the open for people to discover, while focusing on making yourself exceptional.

Number two: Do what you do best.

Your shortcomings can never be your advantages. For example, I am not very competent in speaking and can only make it not bad as best I can, but it will never be my strength. If I am always grasping at stating this shortcoming, then I am going to live under the shadow of inferiority forever.

Likewise, you want to show what you do best. You know a lot on pets, then you write about the topic of pets; you have made research on financial management, then you write about it; you can do PPT, then specialize in teaching people to do it; you are good at language, then write about the content of it.

The barrel theory is defunct currently, you just have to do what you do best and play it to the extreme to become a professional, and others won’t be too concerned about your shortcomings. Because what you do best can bring value to someone else, they naturally will not care what your flaws are.

Number 3: Learning to share

Be generous. No one who can share have bad luck. Because of the people who will share, opportunities will always come to you. You do not have to worry that what you are sharing is not worthy. You are not an audience, so how do you know what you are sharing worth nothing?

The biggest advantage about sharing is that you can find like-minded people. What you share represents your values, your personal views. Once shared, for others to see, there is bound to be agreement with your point of view. And there are audiences that will even give you valuable advice or make friends with you. Sharing creates a “connection” and you will meet different people, different things. Imagine if everyone in the world does not share and everyone hid, the society cannot make progress.

The so-called connections are not meaningless, but do not deliberately run them, just do what you have to do, and connections will naturally come up. Many people waste time and energy trying to build connections but forget that they have no value. “Can we follow each other?” This is the saddest issue on the internet. You provide valuable information and others will naturally pay attention to you.

Number 4: Storytelling

Everyone should tell stories, and people loves stories. Your work does not speak for itself; you need to give them life.

When you put your work out on the public platform, you are already telling the story of your work. Every email you send, every message you send, every conversation you have, every photo you reply to every day. These are all part of the story.

How to tell a story? The most basic framework is the “three-part theory”, past, present, and future.

The first part of your past: what you want, why you want this thing, what you have done so far to get. Part 2: What you are doing now, how hard you are working, how you are trying to use all the resources you can. Part 3: The way forward and how to reach your goals.

Everyone loves a good story, but not everyone can say it easily. This skill takes a lifetime to learn. So do your research on the best stories, and then look for the ones that belong to you. The more often you share, the better the story will be told.

Number 5: Maintaining the reputation in the internet.

The web platform is your second business card, and you have to work hard to maintain it and be a qualified and civilized person online. Do not just focus on how many fans you have, focus on behavior first. If you are constantly berating people online, think about it differently – can you stand it if they berate you? Even though the web is an open platform, it needs to be civilized and respect.

If you want fans, be a fan yourself first; if you want a community to accept you, be a good citizen of the community first. If you are just being an “egoist” on the internet. No one will follow you. Your reputation means your word of mouth and represents your personal brand.

Number 6: Learning to accept

When your work is placed on social platforms for a lot of people to see, you have to be prepared for all the good and the bad. The more people see your work, the more comments you’ll have to deal with.

How to handle outside feedback is significant. The book, “Essence”, divides outside feedback into three categories: positive affirmations, negative and critical comments, and cues to previously unknown aspects. Each type of feedback has a specific value. Positive feedback strengthens our indecisiveness and boosts our self-confidence; negativity and criticism prompt us to reflect and correct previous misconceptions; and the aspect of prompting previous positions allows us to discover new worlds and make us think more thoughtfully.

Those bad sounds, hearing it does not mean you need to receive it. You don’t have to care what everyone thinks of you, just care what those who really like you think.

The mature mind, which is able to be impartial and fair to its own and other people’s opinions, does not rest on its laurels or follow blindly.

Number 7: Persistence is key.

Updates from every well-known blogger are extremely frequent. Look closely at all the stories of overnight fame and you’ll see that behind them all is years of persistence.

You can never predict when you’ll succeed, but if you don’t persist, that day will never come; and if you do, there’s at least a sliver of a chance, even a small one.

This is an example post, originally published as part of Blogging University. Enroll in one of our ten programs, and start your blog right.

You’re going to publish a post today. Don’t worry about how your blog looks. Don’t worry if you haven’t given it a name yet, or you’re feeling overwhelmed. Just click the “New Post” button, and tell us why you’re here.

Why do this?

• Because it gives new readers context. What are you about? Why should they read your blog?
• Because it will help you focus you own ideas about your blog and what you’d like to do with it.

The post can be short or long, a personal intro to your life or a bloggy mission statement, a manifesto for the future or a simple outline of your the types of things you hope to publish.

To help you get started, here are a few questions:

• Why are you blogging publicly, rather than keeping a personal journal?
• What topics do you think you’ll write about?
• Who would you love to connect with via your blog?
• If you blog successfully throughout the next year, what would you hope to have accomplished?

You’re not locked into any of this; one of the wonderful things about blogs is how they constantly evolve as we learn, grow, and interact with one another — but it’s good to know where and why you started, and articulating your goals may just give you a few other post ideas.

Can’t think how to get started? Just write the first thing that pops into your head. Anne Lamott, author of a book on writing we love, says that you need to give yourself permission to write a “crappy first draft”. Anne makes a great point — just start writing, and worry about editing it later.

When you’re ready to publish, give your post three to five tags that describe your blog’s focus — writing, photography, fiction, parenting, food, cars, movies, sports, whatever. These tags will help others who care about your topics find you in the Reader. Make sure one of the tags is “zerotohero,” so other new bloggers can find you, too.